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No Tuesday is complete without a visit to college football news to read Pete Fiutak's weekly Cavalcade of Whimsy column, excellent read for college football fans, this week he offers up some potential good news to fans of tOSU, and scary news to everyone else in the nation.

 

“I can handle this. This man has a bad heart, but I have plenty of medicine. My name is Dr. Gonzo. Prepare our suite at once. We'll be in the bar.” ... It was 5 a.m. and I was just getting to bed after another long college football Saturday. While brushing my teeth, I had an epiphany, or maybe it was a hallucination, and then a cold shiver ran down my spine as if I had just found out someone had died.

 

I saw the future of the 2008 college football season, and it is not good.

 

If you’re having a good day and are in a good mood, then stop reading this right now. Go medicate yourself with an Oreo, take a deep breath, and just keep telling yourself that everything is going to be O.K.

 

Tell me if any of this sounds even the slightest bit far-fetched considering the recent history of all the teams I’m about to throw into the mix.

 

- USC might be better than it’s been in the last few seasons, but considering the way the program occasionally plays down to the competition, and how Stanford and Oregon pulled off wins last year, let’s say the Trojans, stuck in the malaise of an easy run of Pac 10 games, gack at Arizona on October 25th. Then let’s say they politely excuse themselves from the national title discussion as Rick Neuheisel, Norm Chow and the UCLA Bruins pull a Tennessee-win performance out of their behinds in early December. That might sound crazy, but so did that 13-9 loss to a mediocre Bruin team at the end of the 2006 season when everything was on the line.

 

- BYU loses at TCU but screws up Utah’s dream season in Salt Lake City at the end of November, so there are no unbeatens from the Mountain West.

 

- Boise State goes 12-0, but no one thinks too much of it. The Broncos go to the BCS, but they’re not really in any serious discussion for the national title.

 

- Remembering Oklahoma’s problems at Colorado and Texas Tech last year, the yearly brain-cramp will come at Kansas State and/or at Oklahoma State. Texas loses to Oklahoma and Kansas but beats Missouri. The Tigers are shocked by Iowa State or Nebraska and loses to Kansas, but ends up getting to the Big 12 title game and gets their revenge against Oklahoma. In other words, all the top Big 12 teams will beat each other up.

 

- The SEC teams start picking each other off. Florida beats LSU but loses to Georgia. Georgia loses at LSU and at Auburn. The Florida/LSU winner in the SEC title game has a loss and is an almost certain lock to play for the national title.

 

Meanwhile, Beanie comes back and plays like the No. 1 pick in the 2009 NFL Draft.

 

I told you not to read this if you were having a good day, but remembering all the craziness of last year, and remembering how Ohio State found its way into the national championship game, if USC somehow gets upset twice, everyone of note outside of the SEC champion will likely have two losses. There’s still a chance in this long, long season that Ohio State rears its brutally ugly big game head and stays alive for a third straight trip to the big show.

 

Yes, really.

 

What happens if Chris Wells is back and healthy, Terrelle Pryor plays like the world-beater he’s supposed to be, and the Buckeye offense starts to rock? Really rock.

 

“All of a sudden, if Pryor starts to become a star, Ohio State changes,” said Big Ten Network lead analyst Charles Davis. “Now, Ohio State becomes a team everyone’s going to want to pay attention to instead of a team everyone had to watch because they had to. Pryor could change everything.”

 

Let’s say the Buckeyes pull off tough, impressive wins at Wisconsin and Michigan State, they give Penn State its one loss of the year, and they blast Illinois in Champaign. All of a sudden, everyone starts talking about how the USC game might have been different if Beanie was alive and kicking and if Pryor was running the show full-time. The voters will start noticing that this is a vastly different team from the one that looked so brutal at the start of the year. All of a sudden, it’s the first week of December and it’s between the new look Buckeyes and a slew of two-loss teams to play the SEC champion for the national title.

 

I’m sorry. Now try to unring that bell in your head and try to enjoy the rest of your day.

 

Yes, I have also rigged up a very very very unlikely sequence of events that would get my team the 1-2 and unranked West Virginia Mountaineers into the big game as well, unfortunately it starts with hitting the proverbial reset button and starting the season again. Hey it works on NCAA Football 09.

 

--Mike

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I'll be honest with you, tOSU fans don't really want this, either. Frankly, I was initially kind of relieved when they lost to Illinios late last year b/c that team wasn't ready for prime time. This year was supposed to be the year in terms of talent--the roster is loaded, on paper--but team morale started low b/c of the BCS fiascos and then Beanie went down in the first game and morale sunk further. Once the "redemption" theme for this season went up in smoke in the second quarter against USC, the rest of the veterans started playing like they just don't want to get hurt and ruin their position on the draft board. This team is not a threat right now.

 

Pryor adds an interesting new dimension to this team, and if Beanie ever comes back at 100% maybe it will snap them out of this funk. But for right now, I think they're going to struggle with Minnesota this weekend. The BCS will be tOSU-free this year. I'd be thrilled with an Outback or CapOne Bowl.

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To be honest, I'm not too worried about Minnesota, mostly because their 4-0 record is pretty much vs. scrubs anyways. However, this may just be because I remember Minnesota last year was like 1-12 or something...very Dolphins-esque. Haven't actually seen any tape of Minnesota this year, but I feel kinda good, especially because Pryor is doing pretty well. I mean, he threw a pass longer than 10 yards last game, that's gotta mean something, right? :unsure

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Pryor is doing pretty well. I mean, he threw a pass longer than 10 yards last game, that's gotta mean something, right? :unsure

He did well when he was allowed to throw last week. It will be interesting to see how/if they loosen the reigns on him as the season goes on.

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Big 11 kicks off this Saturday. I think the Michigan-Wisconsin game will be interesting. If Michigan's offense continues to show improvement (and they hang on to the dang ball) it could be a close game.

 

Penn State and Illinois should be a fun game to watch as well. It could be one of those last team with the ball wins type of game.

 

tUoOS should handle Goldy w/o too much problem, espicially with Beanie back in the lineup. That added dimension could really allow Pryor to shine.

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That's fucked up, not gonna lie. Will be nice to see the Dukies get more than, like, 2 wins this season, though.

 

Well they're already 2-1 this season so they're almost there. They haven't been favored in an ACC game since 2002. It will be interesting to see how many people take the pick.

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What a great early Christmas present. I wasn't expecting the first USC loss to happen while it was still September.

 

I can only hope this removes them from the national championship picture (though it probably won't -- not yet). Now let's see who else can be toppled. :thumbup

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