bigshoulders Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Karen to Creed: "You shouldn't dangle paperclips in front of a baby. It might swallow one."Creed: "It's okay, I have plenty."************************************************************************** Stanley: "I don't know and I don't care."************************************************************************** Creed: "Swing low, sweet chariots."************************************************************************** Here's one from last week's episode that I particularly like:Michael to Dwight: "You are a thief of joy."************************************************************************** Quote Link to post Share on other sites
radiokills Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 I declare bankruptcy Quote Link to post Share on other sites
MrRain422 Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 You ruined my joke. Get out of my offive. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kimcatch22 Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Dwight: Once I’m officially regional manager, my first order of business will be to demote Jim Halpert. So I will need a new number two. My ideal choice? Jack Bauer. But he is unavailable. Fictional. And overqualified. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
lamradio Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Oscar: Besides having sex with men, I'd would say the 'Finer Things Club' is the gayest thing about me. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
austrya Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Andy: Andy Bernard does not lose contests. He wins them. Or he quits them. Because they're unfair. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sir Stewart Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Hunter: "You took me by the hand/made me a man" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
myboyblue Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Andy: Andy Bernard does not lose contests. He wins them. Or he quits them. Because they're unfair. Andy is a highlight on a show full of highlights. He's genius.Hunter: "You took me by the hand/made me a man" This was one of the wilder episodes they have had. Great stuff. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
bigshoulders Posted October 15, 2008 Author Share Posted October 15, 2008 That One Night by The Hunted [mp3] I moonlight for DMI-Denton, and if any of you Office fans want to join Quote Link to post Share on other sites
bobbob1313 Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Creed: That's Andrea, the office bitch. You'll get used to her. Creed: In the 60's, I had a lot of sex, mostly outdoors, with a lot of people. A man might've slipped in, there'd be no way to know. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kimcatch22 Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Angela: In the Martin family we like to say "Looks like someone took the slow train from Philly." That's code for "Check out the slut." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
bigshoulders Posted October 15, 2008 Author Share Posted October 15, 2008 Dwight: "The eyes are the groin of the head." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kimcatch22 Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Creed: That's Andrea, the office bitch. You'll get used to her. Creed: In the 60's, I had a lot of sex, mostly outdoors, with a lot of people. A man might've slipped in, there'd be no way to know. I love Creed so much. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
bobbob1313 Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 I love Creed so much. Creed doesn't get a whole bunch of lines, but he kills every single one of them. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
bigshoulders Posted October 15, 2008 Author Share Posted October 15, 2008 Michael to Jan: "You cheated on me when I specifically asked you not to?" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
cryptique Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Dwight: I am faster than 80% of all snakes. (I believe that's from the deleted scenes on DVD) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Moe_Syzlak Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Michael: [to Karen] Wow, you are very exotic looking. Was your dad a G.I.? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
lamradio Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Michael: The website is a brainchild of my brainchild: Ryan. It is my brain-grandchild Quote Link to post Share on other sites
redpillbox Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Jim (as Dwight): WRONG! Black Bear. Bears. Beats. Battlestar Gallactica! ***** Not exactly right--> Michael: Call the Law Offices of James P. Allbini, see if he handles hate crimes. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
austrya Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 I seem to recall Angela saying something about Oscar in last week's episode, but I can't find it anywhere. ETA: Angela: I once reported Oscar to the INS, turns out he's clean, but I'm glad I did it. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
bigshoulders Posted October 15, 2008 Author Share Posted October 15, 2008 I'm surprised no one's chimed in w/ the ubiquitous "That's what she said." Here's a funny article on the subject: "That's What She Said" Joke Made Every Time Archeology Professor Refers to Bone Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ikol Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Michael: I'm not superstitious, but I'm a little stitious. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
WilcoOfTheDay Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 I declare bankruptcy Jim (as Dwight): WRONG! Black Bear. Bears. Beats. Battlestar Gallactica! Two of my favorites...but some more favorites from Michael Scott: Yeah, I went hunting once. Shot a deer in the leg. Had to kill it with a shovel. Took about an hour. Why do you ask? You may look around, and see two groups here. White collar, blue collar. But I don't see it that way. You know why not? Because I am collar-blind. Yes. It is true. I, Michael Scott, am signing up with an online dating service. Thousands of people have done it, and I am going to do it. I need a username, and...I have a great one - "Little Kid Lover". That way people will know exactly where my priorities are at. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
radiokills Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 And then BAM! His capa was detated from his head. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mrs. Peel Posted October 15, 2008 Share Posted October 15, 2008 Michael drinking wine: That is sort of an oaky afterbirth. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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