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One of my cats is very unhappy as part of my family


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I have a beautiful long haired white cat (indoor only) that is unhappy in my family. I'm now at the point where this cat has to go. Based on the pattern of its unpleasant behavior, I'm confident that this animal would be happy living as an only pet, or maybe in a house with one other animal (as oposed to our three other cats and one dog).

 

I would never abandon an animal in an inhumane way. Any ideas how to humanely get rid of a pet? I've already tried to find it a home, to no avail. Do pet shelters and/or the humane society allow people to surrender an animal for a fee?

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Have you tried posting on Petfinder.com? I had to find another home for a cat when it decided it hated my daughter. I was very frank about my feelings that it should go to an adult only home. A woman called me who had a mouse problem (this cat was a particularly good hunter) and when she got the cat back to her house she called me within a half hour telling me that the cat had caught a mouse already and how happy she was. So, good stuff all around.

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Have you tried posting on Petfinder.com? I had to find another home for a cat when it decided it hated my daughter. I was very frank about my feelings that it should go to an adult only home. A woman called me who had a mouse problem (this cat was a particularly good hunter) and when she got the cat back to her house she called me within a half hour telling me that the cat had caught a mouse already and how happy she was. So, good stuff all around.

 

Great, I'll check that out. Thanks! Glad to hear your success story.

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Have it put down.

 

Since GoN went there, I'll go one better: I have some good recipes for Cat.

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Have you tried reasoning with him? Maybe there's a place in your house just for him? A clset somewhere? The attic? Boiler room? Garage?

 

She's too much of a lap-kitty for seclusion. If she was a loner, there wouldn't be much of a problem.

 

The main problem is, if she's in my lap and along comes any other animal, it's slicing and biting time. If I have her in my lap and I shift a little so I can reach my drink, it's slicing and biting time. If I pet her more than a few seconds, it's slicing and biting time. If I brush her for more than a few seconds, it's slicing and biting time.

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Remove her teeth and claws or poke around (craigslist, etc.) for people in the market for an aggressive cat.

 

That's some good advice. This cat sounds like it would make an excellent companion for a 16 year old bi-polar cutter.

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That's some good advice. This cat sounds like it would make an excellent companion for a 16 year old bi-polar cutter.

 

:rotfl

 

But in all seriousness, an aggressive cat is going to be a tough sale on craigslist or anywhere like that... You could do what we did with our aggressive family cat when I was a kid; make her an outside cat. She was mean as hell (and the reason why I've never and will never own another cat) but she lived a long happy life outside.. We hardly saw her but when we did, she had a rodent in her mouth that she would later put on our front porch... She was in a cat paradise.. And honestly, I think all cats are happier living outside..

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:rotfl

 

But in all seriousness, an aggressive cat is going to be a tough sale on craigslist or anywhere like that... You could do what we did with our aggressive family cat when I was a kid; make her an outside cat. She was mean as hell (and the reason why I've never and will never own another cat) but she lived a long happy life outside.. We hardly saw her but when we did, she had a rodent in her mouth that she would later put on our front porch... She was in a cat paradise.. And honestly, I think all cats are happier living outside..

 

I think we're going to attempt to surrender her to the local no-kill shelter this weekend. Because of her long white fur and different colored eyes, we think some crazy cat person might want her for aesthetic reasons. If the shelter won't take her, maybe we'll make her an outdoor cat. Although she's an indoor cat, she has been outside a couple times unsupervised for a whole day and didn't get lost or hurt.

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Let me just chime in here. If it's a longhaired cat you really don't want to make her an outdoor cat. Her fur will get all matted and she'll be miserable. Some cats do thrive outdoors, but honestly, longhaired cats don't.

 

Also, I really do think it's better to put a cat down humanely than to put it through a few weeks or months of misery before it gets killed anyway. I hate to relate this story, but since you're dealing with a situation I've had some experience with, I will. I had a beautiful Maine Coon cat who was always a little weird, but basically she was pretty content for the first 7 or 8 years of her life. Then when I moved, I was in a situation where it was absolutely not possible for me to keep her. For several months she lived with an elderly friend of the family, but she was getting progressively more unhappy--staying under the bed all the time, hissing, peeing outside her box, etc. When she started scratching, the woman who was keeping her said she just couldn't do it any longer (she was taking blood thinners and was afraid for her health if she got scratched or bitten). There just seemed to be no solution to this problem, and everyone was telling me to take her to the SPCA. I considered it, and they said they would take her, but they also told me honestly that the chances she would be adopted were extremely slim.

 

After trying everything else I could think of, I reluctantly came to the agonizing decision that the best available option was to have her put down. I called several vets, every one of whom was--in my opinion--a real dick about this. Most of them said they would not put a healthy animal down, and one that said they would do it tried to make me feel like a cold, unfeeling bitch. I was honestly at wit's end, but then I thought of calling PETA. (We're lucky to have their headquarters in Norfolk.) They were incredibly understanding and supportive and were the only ones who seemed to understand the dilemma I was in. They told me that what I was considering was the most responsible thing in my specific circumstances. I really needed to hear that, frankly, because as a huge animal lover, this was tearing me apart.

 

Long story (not so) short: I gave her a last meal of tuna, which she gobbled up, then I wrapped her in a towel and took her to PETA where I stayed with her until the end, which was quick and peaceful. I won't tell you how many tears I shed that day, and it still makes me incredibly sad to think about it. But I really don't question that this was the best thing to do. She had a good life up until the last 6 months, then she had one final day where she was back with me and got her favorite treat and then poof, it was over.

 

I'm not saying that your situation and mine are exactly the same, but I hope it helps you to know that someone here can definitely relate, and I honestly think it's a loving thing to not put your cat through any more stress and misery. I don't quite get the concept of "no kill" shelters--what do they do with those animals that don't get adopted? If they have some way to handle this, then of course don't just recklessly kill the cat. But there are many worse things than a quiet, painless death.

 

Yuck. I don't envy you, and I hope you find a solution that you can feel at peace with.

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Let me just chime in here. If it's a longhaired cat you really don't want to make her an outdoor cat. Her fur will get all matted and she'll be miserable. Some cats do thrive outdoors, but honestly, longhaired cats don't.

 

 

 

Actually our family outdoor cat had long hair.. She had long black hair with yellow eyes.. She was terrifying.

 

She'd come to the house every few days for food and of course to bring us her latest kill... I don't remember her hair ever getting matted but she would get a bath ever so often..

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Let me just chime in here. If it's a longhaired cat you really don't want to make her an outdoor cat. Her fur will get all matted and she'll be miserable. Some cats do thrive outdoors, but honestly, longhaired cats don't.

 

Also, I really do think it's better to put a cat down humanely than to put it through a few weeks or months of misery before it gets killed anyway. I hate to relate this story, but since you're dealing with a situation I've had some experience with, I will. I had a beautiful Maine Coon cat who was always a little weird, but basically she was pretty content for the first 7 or 8 years of her life. Then when I moved, I was in a situation where it was absolutely not possible for me to keep her. For several months she lived with an elderly friend of the family, but she was getting progressively more unhappy--staying under the bed all the time, hissing, peeing outside her box, etc. When she started scratching, the woman who was keeping her said she just couldn't do it any longer (she was taking blood thinners and was afraid for her health if she got scratched or bitten). There just seemed to be no solution to this problem, and everyone was telling me to take her to the SPCA. I considered it, and they said they would take her, but they also told me honestly that the chances she would be adopted were extremely slim.

 

After trying everything else I could think of, I reluctantly came to the agonizing decision that the best available option was to have her put down. I called several vets, every one of whom was--in my opinion--a real dick about this. Most of them said they would not put a healthy animal down, and one that said they would do it tried to make me feel like a cold, unfeeling bitch. I was honestly at wit's end, but then I thought of calling PETA. (We're lucky to have their headquarters in Norfolk.) They were incredibly understanding and supportive and were the only ones who seemed to understand the dilemma I was in. They told me that what I was considering was the most responsible thing in my specific circumstances. I really needed to hear that, frankly, because as a huge animal lover, this was tearing me apart.

 

Long story (not so) short: I gave her a last meal of tuna, which she gobbled up, then I wrapped her in a towel and took her to PETA where I stayed with her until the end, which was quick and peaceful. I won't tell you how many tears I shed that day, and it still makes me incredibly sad to think about it. But I really don't question that this was the best thing to do. She had a good life up until the last 6 months, then she had one final day where she was back with me and got her favorite treat and then poof, it was over.

 

I'm not saying that your situation and mine are exactly the same, but I hope it helps you to know that someone here can definitely relate, and I honestly think it's a loving thing to not put your cat through any more stress and misery. I don't quite get the concept of "no kill" shelters--what do they do with those animals that don't get adopted? If they have some way to handle this, then of course don't just recklessly kill the cat. But there are many worse things than a quiet, painless death.

 

Yuck. I don't envy you, and I hope you find a solution that you can feel at peace with.

 

Wow, that's a terrible scenario. I'm sorry you had to go through that, but I'm glad you found a sympathetic vet that helped provide closure.

 

The no kill shelter here is a three bedroom house with a bunch of kitty condos and cat toys. The cats live there, roaming freely and lounging around until they get adopted. On-site vets provide care and shots for the animals when needed. We have two cats that we adopted from them and they are well adjusted and gentle animals. Since we had success with the animals we adopted there, I feel pretty comfortable bringing our problem cat there for a chance to find a more suitable home.

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Jff, have you had your kitty examined by a vet, and if so, what do they recommend?

 

We have not had her examined specifically to address her behavior issues, but she is up to date on shots, etc., and no issues of concern have ever been mentioned by the vet.

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There are a lot of illnesses that can manifest in a cat that a vet wouldn't pick up on in a routine exam. You should take her back to discuss the behavioral issues and have them run the appropriate tests before you dump her. It might be something as simple as a cycle on some antidepressants. or maybe her thyroid is out of whack. But you won't know until you take her in for this specific issue.

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The no kill shelter here is a three bedroom house with a bunch of kitty condos and cat toys. The cats live there, roaming freely and lounging around until they get adopted. On-site vets provide care and shots for the animals when needed. We have two cats that we adopted from them and they are well adjusted and gentle animals. Since we had success with the animals we adopted there, I feel pretty comfortable bringing our problem cat there for a chance to find a more suitable home.

 

Well, that actually does sound like a good scenario, so your situation sounds much less bleak than mine was. I'm glad you have options like that. Your cat sounds like it would be very happy in a one-person household. Good luck!

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A cat that doesn't like other cats for whatever reason isn't going to do well at that no-kill shelter where they are forced to interact with the other cats. And most no-kill shelters are such in as much as the cat is adoptable. If she terrorizes the other cats on a routine basis, is it possible they will euthanize her?

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My girlfriends sister had 2 cats and a dog that co-existed nicely for years. Then suddenly one day one of the cats stated to terrorize the dog and cat. She would have the two of them cowering in a corner of a room. Eventually she decided she needed to get rid of this cat so the other 2 animals could have some peace. My girlfriend and I said we'd take her in and give it a go. At first she took a while getting settled, and she tried to scare away our other cat, but that cat is the most laid back and fearless cat I've ever seen and he didn't blink when she'd hiss and attempt to scare him off. Eventually she just stopped trying after enough failed attempts and accepted defeat. It's now years later and both cats seem happy and there aren't any issues. Hopefully your cat will have a similar fate.

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A cat that doesn't like other cats for whatever reason isn't going to do well at that no-kill shelter where they are forced to interact with the other cats. And most no-kill shelters are such in as much as the cat is adoptable. If she terrorizes the other cats on a routine basis, is it possible they will euthanize her?

 

I'm confident that our cat's behavior stems from jealousy over me and my wife. I've never witnessed this cat act out towards another animal except for when I or my wife are present. It mainly happens when she is sitting on (or next to) one of us and another animal comes along and gets too close. Then everyone within paw range gets cut.

 

I'm sure no-kill shelters do have to euthanize animals from time to time, due to age, health or behavior. They're only "no-kill" in that they don't euthanize the animals based on their adoption period having expired, like the county/city pound does.

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My girlfriends sister had 2 cats and a dog that co-existed nicely for years. Then suddenly one day one of the cats stated to terrorize the dog and cat. She would have the two of them cowering in a corner of a room. Eventually she decided she needed to get rid of this cat so the other 2 animals could have some peace. My girlfriend and I said we'd take her in and give it a go. At first she took a while getting settled, and she tried to scare away our other cat, but that cat is the most laid back and fearless cat I've ever seen and he didn't blink when she'd hiss and attempt to scare him off. Eventually she just stopped trying after enough failed attempts and accepted defeat. It's now years later and both cats seem happy and there aren't any issues. Hopefully your cat will have a similar fate.

 

Something similar to this would be the ideal scenario. I'm still hoping we'll find a friend or relative that will take her in.

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