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Misspoken or Misunderstood phrases


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I might need a couple hours...

 

(notice I didn't say "a couple of hours)

 

alot

lay/lie (I laid down on the bed.)

prolly (on teh internets)

teh internets

irregardless (NOT A WORD!)

liberry

It's (prolly) okay, but I hate "as per" as in "as per your post."

could of (I could of used proper English.)

tenant/tenet

its/it's

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My roommate was in the kitchen and asked me, "What is this Tuscan seasoning?" He pronounced it like Tucson, AZ intead of Tuscan. We don't let him cook much.

 

 

:lol

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Using "lead" as the past tense of "lead."

 

I know it's pronounced like the soft metal, people, but it's spelled "led."

 

This has begun to seep into the mainstream media. I occasionally spot it in stories from so-called professional journalists. Editorial standards have really gone to shit.

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"Punkin" is another one that really irritates me.

Aw, I use that one all the time (intentionally) with my kids. Most of my current word-butcherings are kid-related. They have a far more interesting approach to language than adults do. :lol

 

One thing that completely baffled me when I went to college in the midwest after growing up on the east coast--people who say things like: "My car needs fixed."

 

What?? I think you forgot a couple words in there, pal. :rolleyes

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One thing that completely baffled me when I went to college in the midwest after growing up on the east coast--people who say things like: "My car needs fixed."

 

What?? I think you forgot a couple words in there, pal. :rolleyes

I've lived in the midwest my whole life and I've never heard anyone say something like that. :dontgetit

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Aw, I use that one all the time (intentionally) with my kids. Most of my current word-butcherings are kid-related. They have a far more interesting approach to language than adults do. :lol

 

That's good, reinforce it when they're young. :thumbup

 

:lol

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No, but Jay's mom shops at Kohl and Targets.

 

We always tease her about those.

 

 

 

My Mom always says Price Shopper i/o Price Chopper. It irks the HELL outta me!!! :realmad

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I used to have a boss from Switzerland who would say "doubleupment" instead of "developent". Drove me nuts.

 

Check this Henry Rollins bit out:

 

I got this amazing letter from a fella named Boris. And I wanted to read this to you. He's, he's from um, the Czech Republic. And I wanted to read you this quick letter by the cat because he's just amazing. And he wrote one of the greatest sentences I haveve ever read in my life and I very much want to share it with you. And I'm not trying to put the guy down, and I'm not saying 'Oh he's dumb.' He's just a cat, he's trying to use English and it's not his language. You know, but he's getting by. Like, how well do you get by in Czech? Right. Help?!? You know, you say 'Check, please!' But you can't get by in Czech. This guy's struggling in English and he's making it! And he's, he is, he is avant. He is, he's bebop! Check this

guy out.

 

This is 8/22/98 12:16 PM, Los Angeles, California

Boris checks in from the Czech Republic with this burning missive:

 

'Hello Henry,

I'm sorry for my English, but I understand English very little, thank you for

your favour. My name is Boris. Have 24 years in right Czech Republic. You

played in Czech 2x. Both concerts, they were splendid.'

 

OK. Check out this sentence.

 

'On two concert, I'm shootive collective photo but small, fat, bald headed

technologist be insane. '

 

Let's milk it shall we?

 

'On two concert, I'm shootive collective photo, but such small, fat, bald

headed techologist be insane.'

 

In translation, I think he took his roll of film to Rite Aid and had a bad Rite

Aid experience. And you've all had that experience in Thrifty and Rite Aid

where time seems to slow down. I think Boris got his film fucked up by the

technologist who must be WHOOOOOOO!, a bit insane.

 

I go on.

 

'I compilation all material for you and band. I would like to read of your

some book, but don't publish in Czech language. This book should be successful

in Czech Republic.'

 

Sure.

 

'I you for very much autograph or publicity material or answer in my letter.

Thanks a lot for it. I wish for you, band much power, health, and energy at

further way music. Goodbye in future concert in Czech Republic. Boris'

 

The communique from Boris makes me think of how great a feature-length movie

with this use of language would be. Could you imagine an intense courtroom

drama with scowling, wildly gesticulating lawyers making a case for their

clients, kicking it like Boris? Think of having the air flight attendent come

on with an "English as a second language" message. 'For making

landing immediate time incredibly, broken moving not now, stupid motor on

flaming. I declaration emergency!'

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