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For all of you Eagles haters...


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I heard a promo for it on the radio last week or so and it made me throw up in my mouth a little

 

but things always sound like crap on the radio, in their defense (seemed lushy, overproduced/compressed, soulless)

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Oh my god. I looked on that list and saw a name I haven't heard in years. Roger Whittaker. I remember my mom giving me this disc when I was like 5. It wasn't a real record. It was like this flimsy little recored type thing. I want to say it was square also. It was Roger Whittaker's version of Mammy Blue. I can't even begin to think of how many times I listened to that. I played it on this little plastic Fisher Price type record player. Wow does that take me back

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My head is filled with (what should be forgettable) songs from the 1970s as my eyes soak in the scenes of another Tuesday morning. I’ve been listening to The Eagles’ Greatest Hits vol. 2 for about 35 minutes, and I am now prepared to fight anyone who claims Don Henley sucks. Maybe it’s because I grew up listening to these guys, or maybe it’s because I just feel like takin’ it easy, but I can only think of two things wrong with The Eagles: the song “The Greeks Don’t Want No Freaks”, and Joe Walsh’s guitar faces.

My adoration for the smooth sounds of Southern California’s finest commercially successful country-rock may come as a surprise to everyone except my (non-existent) financial advisor. Over the course of my life, I have spent roughly $515 on The Eagles. This includes: two (2) concerts, two (2) concert t-shirts, two (2) live DVDs, one (1) live VHS, one (1) CD box set, three (3) greatest hits compilations, seven (7) studio albums CDs, two (2) studio albums cassettes, and two (2) live albums. Don’t even get me started on solo material!

The crazy thing is, The Eagles aren’t even my favorite band (granted they were from grades 2-9). I’ve never bought multiple copies of their albums merely for the “bonus content” which oddly enough, I already own (like I do with Elvis Costello), nor do I have a man-crush on any of the members of The Eagles (as I do with Jeff Tweedy of Wilco). In fact, I may actively participate in a conversation that mocks The Eagles, if a potential advancement in my social status rests on my inclusion in such an event. And that’s because I’m a pussy, which is why I listen to The Eagles, which is why I’m a pussy, etc.

 

 

*this is an excerpt from an essay I recently finished.

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Revised Chart Policy Lands Eagles At No. 1

The Eagles

November 06, 2007, 8:30 PM ET

Mitchell Peters, L.A.

The Eagles' first new studio album in 28 years, "Long Road Out of Eden," takes a short route to No. 1 on The Billboard 200 after Billboard revised a significant chart policy today (Nov. 7).

 

In consultation with Nielsen SoundScan, Billboard will now allow exclusive album titles that are only available through one retailer to appear on The Billboard 200 and other charts, effective with this week's charts. Prior to this, proprietary titles were not eligible to appear on most Billboard charts.

 

Early SoundScan numbers have the Eagles taking the top perch on The Billboard 200 with 711,000 copies sold, with most sales moved by Wal-Mart and Sam's Club stores. For now, the only other U.S. outlets carrying "Eden" are walmart.com, where both physical copies and downloads are sold, and the Eagles' own Web site.

 

"Eden" became available at the mass-market chain Oct. 30. Aside from two compilations, this is the Eagles' first album since the mostly live "Hell Freezes Over," which led The Billboard 200 for two weeks in 1994.

 

Britney Spears' new Jive album, "Blackout," which would have been No. 1 had the Eagles' data not been reported, will open at No. 2 with first-week sales of 290,000 copies.

 

"We know that some retailers will be uncomfortable with this policy, but it was inevitable that Billboard's charts would ultimately widen the parameters to reflect changes that are unfolding in music distribution," says Geoff Mayfield, Billboard's director of charts. "We would have preferred to make this decision earlier, but only became aware within the last 24 hours that Wal-Mart would be willing to share the data for this title with Nielsen SoundScan."

 

The revised policy initially impacts The Billboard 200 and Top Country Albums, where "Eden" will also bow at No. 1. Criteria for the remainder of Billboard's albums charts will be formulated later this week. A handful of other titles will debut this week on The Billboard 200 as a consequence of the policy revision.

 

Previously, titles that were not generally available at retail were not eligible to appear on The Billboard 200, but were entitled to chart on Billboard's Top Comprehensive Albums, which includes catalog titles and proprietary albums from retailers willing to report those sales.

 

The comprehensive chart will continue to appear on Billboard.biz, to show how catalog titles compete with the overall market. However, once parameters for the remainder of the album charts are determined, Top Comprehensive Music Videos will be discontinued, as exclusive titles will then be eligible for the Nielsen SoundScan-fed Top Music Videos.

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well, i admit i am a fan. i love the old stuff, so i was looking forward to this, not expecting much though. i got what i expected. ridiculous lyrics (how about some metaphors and less preaching) also the prodution is totally compressed!! its so frustrating these days. like the new bruce album, sounds like they took the sound, stuffed it into a little tin can, put the lid on a poked one hole in it for the sound to eeek out!

anyway, there are a few good henley tunes on the album. some tracks are just insufferable with keyboards circa 1988. i mean, how can these dudes think that sounds good coming out of the 70s. proves my theory that most of the dudes in the 70(except neil young?) just got lucky with technology and the production of the time. they have no sense of production or sonics or arrangement. they just go with what ever the popular methods/instrumentation of time. so many fairly good songs and albums in the 80s and 90s were just ruined by cheese ball production.

i digress. fyi, the joe walsh songs are okay on the new album. (why is he in the eagles?)

all of this is not to say that i haven't been listening to it!

:stunned

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even more impressive when you consider the album is only sold EXCLUSIVELY at Walmart :barf

This is probably the sickest thing about it. Hating the Eagles is way way too easy. Compared to so much of the crap on radio, what I have heard from their new album, doesn't sound all that bad and their greatest hits aren't THAT bad either. People just love to hate these guys, that's all.

 

After all these years of hearing how horrible the Eagles are on VC I continue to take the position that they really aren't that bad.

 

As for Grand Funk....what do people here think, they are a cult band? Heck no, they sold a jillion records and much of what they did was very MOR.

 

LouieB

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I don't think they're that bad, but they are very generic in sound to these ears. It's no-risk, fluffy, and mundane to me.

 

I think the middle-of-the-road tag fits well on them. They sell a lot of albums because they write safe Pop tunes that are easy to sing along to and appeal to a lot of the Baby Boomers.

 

They're fine musicians with decent vocals/harmonies and some catchy lyrics. Nothing wrong with that, but they grate on my ears none the less.

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