gogo Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Same-sex couples will start getting married in California at 5:01 this evening. As in 2004, the first couple to be married at San Francisco's city hall today will be Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon. Lesbian pioneer activists see wish fulfilledRachel Gordon, Chronicle Staff Writer Monday, June 16, 2008 (06-15) 17:42 PDT -- Lesbian rights pioneers Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon, together for more than half a century, will get married in San Francisco City Hall this evening wearing the same pastel-colored pantsuits they donned four years ago when they wed the first time. Once again, they will be the first of thousands of same-sex couples rushing to marry. But this time their wedding will be carried by the strength of a California Supreme Court decision that granted lesbian and gay couples the constitutional right to marry. Another change: Their pantsuits. The hems have been taken up since Martin, in pale purple, and Lyon, in powder blue, put them on for their first wedding in City Hall on Feb. 12, 2004. The nuptials that San Francisco city officials sanctioned four years ago were later deemed illegitimate by the state. "We're both getting shorter," said Lyon, who at 83 is four years younger than her partner. What hasn't shrunk is the San Francisco couple's willingness to be at the forefront of a decadeslong civil rights battle, starting for them in an era when homosexuality could get you fired, denied an apartment or arrested during one of the frequent police raids on bars catering to gay men and lesbians. Their life together as activists has entwined the political and the personal and has been marked by a series of groundbreaking and often controversial undertakings. Where they started They founded the Daughters of Bilitis in 1955, the first national lesbian organization. In 1964, they helped launch the Council on Religion and the Homosexual, bringing together national religious leaders and gay and lesbian activists to discuss homosexual rights. Lyon, in a challenge to the leadership of the feminist movement, was the first open lesbian on the board of the National Organization for Women in 1973. Martin, meanwhile, helped lead a successful campaign to get the American Psychiatric Association to take homosexuality off its list of mental illnesses. The couple made international headlines in 2004 when they became the first same-sex couple to wed after San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom and City Attorney Dennis Herrera decided to test state law by allowing more than 4,000 gay and lesbian couples to marry. After a month, the California Supreme Court halted the weddings on the grounds that city officials acted without proper authority. Attention will turn to Martin and Lyon again this evening when they become the first same-sex couple in San Francisco, and perhaps in all of California, to marry when the state Supreme Court's decision officially takes effect just after 5 p.m. "It's really just amazing the progress we've made," Lyon said. Kate Kendell, executive director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights, a public interest law firm that joined the legal battle to overturn the ban on same-sex marriage, said the moment rightfully belongs to them. "It would not be happening were it not for Del and Phyllis," she said. "They and a small cadre of others sacrificed everything to build a foundation that got us to this historic place where we are today." Kendell, who met the couple 14 years ago, has become their de facto gatekeeper and helped plan their wedding. The invitation-only ceremony will take place behind closed doors in the Mayor's Office at City Hall with about 50 family members, friends, neighbors and political allies in attendance. Newsom will preside. "We have to remember to say, 'I do.' OK?" Lyon said. "I think we can do that," Martin said. The interchange was both playful and poignant. The years are catching up with Lyon and Martin. The timing of the California Supreme Court's ruling isn't lost on them. "We're not getting younger," said Martin, quieter and frailer than her partner, during an interview last week in their Noe Valley home. Decades together The thought of being able to get married was not one they could even imagine when the two first shared after-work drinks in Seattle in 1950, a get-together that at first sparked a friendship and two years later a love affair that has endured. To grasp the longevity of their relationship, one only has to know what they paid in 1955 for their small hillside home with a sweeping view of San Francisco. Their paltry salaries as a secretary and a bookkeeper helped them cover the $11,000 price. The years of their accomplishments and passions are displayed on their walls: plaques of appreciation from politicians and civil rights groups and photographs and drawings of such public figures as Hillary Rodham Clinton, Dianne Feinstein, Shirley Chisholm and Eleanor Roosevelt. There is the collection of campaign buttons for Democratic candidates, the baseball autographed by Giants players, and a vast collection of books, including copies of "Lesbian/Woman," which they co-wrote in 1972. They said they spend a lot of time at home now - getting up and down the steep stairs that separate their front door from the sidewalk isn't as easy as it once was. A limousine will pick them up this afternoon for the ride to City Hall, where they probably will be met by cheers from well-wishers and, perhaps, jeers from protesters who believe marriage should be reserved just for heterosexuals. After Martin and Lyon finalize the paperwork and take their vows, they are scheduled to step onto the balcony overlooking the ornate City Hall rotunda for a public cake-cutting ceremony. That will be followed by a private reception at a nearby restaurant, and then it's back home again. There will be no honeymoon. Their daughter, born to Martin 66 years ago during a brief marriage that ended in divorce, will be with them to share in the day's events. "It's really a big deal for them and for me to have this happen at this point in their lives," said Kendra Mon, a social worker from Petaluma who was raised by her two moms and her dad and his new wife. "It's like icing on the cake and a reminder of how far we've come." She thought more about the significance for a few minutes and then likened it to the classic Christmas movie "It's a Wonderful Life" - but with a twist. In the movie, the character played by James Stewart gets to see what his small town and family would be like if he hadn't existed. "But," Mon said, "this is like my moms get to see what life is like because they've been here." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Good Old Neon Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Ummmm Quote Link to post Share on other sites
EL the Famous Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Ummmm Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Good Old Neon Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 I know, almost as tiring as having to watch the same knuckle-dragging mouth-breathers jump up and down with signs bearing that ridiculous slogan Quote Link to post Share on other sites
JUDE Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 I know, almost as tiring as having to watch the same knuckle-dragging mouth-breathers jump up and down with signs bearing that ridiculous slogan Quote Link to post Share on other sites
EL the Famous Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 You know, I must have missed those "mouth-breathers" when they showed up on this board for their protest. Yep. Me too. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Good Old Neon Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Well, you're in luck, they were kind enough to stop and pose for a portrait. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
EL the Famous Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 yay for stereotypes. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gogo Posted June 16, 2008 Author Share Posted June 16, 2008 Ah yes, this is exactly the "yay for people in love getting a happy ending!" thread that I was hoping for... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
EL the Famous Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 sorry. ditto. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
embiggen Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 I'm happy for them! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
EL the Famous Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 I'm happy for them! ditto. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
alison the wilca Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 wow, i didn't know anything about them. that is pretty awesome that they stayed committed to their love and cause in those early years. and all the things they have done... its all pretty incredible. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
renic Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 this just RULES!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yay for them and everyone else who can finally do what they long to do with their partner! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
cryptique Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 We read and heard quite a bit about this while we were in SF. I'm happy that they were the first (again) to be united. I just hope the whole thing withstands a probable challenge at the ballot box this fall. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gogo Posted June 17, 2008 Author Share Posted June 17, 2008 I just hope the whole thing withstands a probable challenge at the ballot box this fall.The polls are looking good. Just back from city hall. Didn't get to see the two of them, but I saw quite a few other happy couples, including a couple of very hot guys wearing t-shirts that said "so, who can get married now, bitch?" Also, the requisite "god hates fags" contingent, being easily upstaged by the happiness surrounding them. I was in the crowd standing across the street from the steps, and at one point the group standing right on the steps started chanting what sounded like "blah blah blah! blah blah blah!". The folks around me finally decided that the hate group had started a "god hates fags" chant, which the rest of the group overwhelmed with "blah blah blahs", instead. I don't know if that's what was really going on, but I'll take that explanation! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gogo Posted August 28, 2008 Author Share Posted August 28, 2008 Del Martin 1921 - 2008 "Ever since I met Del 55 years ago, I could never imagine a day would come when she wouldn't be by my side," Lyon, 83, said in a statement. "I am so lucky to have known her, loved her and been her partner in all things. "I also never imagined there would be a day that we would actually be able to get married," Lyon said. "I am devastated, but I take some solace in knowing we were able to enjoy the ultimate rite of love and commitment before she passed." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
jenbobblehead Posted August 28, 2008 Share Posted August 28, 2008 how incredibly sad. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Central Scrutinizer Posted August 28, 2008 Share Posted August 28, 2008 how incredibly sad. RIP Quote Link to post Share on other sites
uncool2pillow Posted August 28, 2008 Share Posted August 28, 2008 It reminds me of stories about Red Sox fans who just wanted to live long enough to see them win the World Series, on a much more significant level. This woman stayed alive just long enough to marry the love of her life. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Party @ the Moontower Posted August 28, 2008 Share Posted August 28, 2008 Very sad . Trues love and fighting for what you believe in makes for a truly rich life though, even thru all the hard times. On a lighter note, and somewhat on topic I see that Hallmark now has gay marriage cards.http://biz.yahoo.com/ap/080821/gay_wedding_cards.html Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ms. yvon Posted August 28, 2008 Share Posted August 28, 2008 thank you for your dignity and outspokenness, del. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Doug C Posted August 29, 2008 Share Posted August 29, 2008 My wife and I were very saddened during supper when I read of Del's passing in the paper. A truly courageous and remarkable woman. An American hero. She and Phyllis are worth learning more about. I know that I will have some upset GSA members tomorrow. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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