Songs/quotes/poems about life/death/dying/grief?

[jcroach]

So, it's looking like my father only has a few more months to live. Kidney failure coupled with Alzheimer's. My brother and Mother are planning a memorial service. I'd like to include a couple of poetry readings about life and death. Does anyone have any favorites?

 

How about songs? There was a thread a while back about songs people wanted played at their funeral, but none of the suggestions are really appropriate for my 77 year old father. He was never really a music lover, so I don't really have any favorite songs to use.

 

Thanks.

[PopTodd]

I am so sorry to hear about this. My love and prayers to you and your family, j.

 

As far as a response to your question:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBn1_Mq8h0c

[GtrPlyr]

I'm so sorry to hear that jcroach. I lost my Mom to cancer 3 months ago so I have an idea of what you must be going through. I hope you and your family get through this okay.

 

It wasn't easy for me, but family, friends and music helped me, and still help me deal with it.

[Magnetized]

You have my sympathy as well.

 

As to poetry, I once heard this read as a poem at a funeral, sort of as a last blessing from the deceased, and it was very moving. If this fits your situation, I would suggest it to you (courtesy of Bob Dylan):

 

Forever Young

 

May God bless and keep you always

May your wishes all come true

May you always do for others

And let others do for you

May you build a ladder to the stars

And climb on every rung

May you stay forever young

Forever young, forever young

May you stay forever young.

 

May you grow up to be righteous

May you grow up to be true

May you always know the truth

And see the lights surrounding you

May you always be courageous

Stand upright and be strong

May you stay forever young

Forever young, forever young

May you stay forever young.

 

May your hands always be busy

May your feet always be swift

May you have a strong foundation

When the winds of changes shift

May your heart always be joyful

And may your song always be sung

May you stay forever young

Forever young, forever young

May you stay forever young.

[jcroach]

Here's one I'm considering.

 

Do not stand at my grave and weep

Mary Elizabeth Frye (1932)

 

Do not stand at my grave and weep,

I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am in a thousand winds that blow,

I am the softly falling snow.

I am the gentle showers of rain,

I am the fields of ripening grain.

I am in the morning hush,

I am in the graceful rush

Of beautiful birds in circling flight,

I am the starshine of the night.

I am in the flowers that bloom,

I am in a quiet room.

I am in the birds that sing,

I am in each lovely thing.

Do not stand at my grave and cry,

I am not there. I do not die.

[jcroach]

Another

 

Do Not Weep For Me

Author unknown

 

Do not weep for me, for I have lived...

I have joined my hand with my fellows' hands,

to leave the planet better than I found it.

Do not weep for me, for I have loved and been loved by

my family, by those I loved who loved me back

for I never knew a stranger, only friends.

Do not weep for me.

When you feel the ocean spray upon your face,

I am there.

When your heart beats faster at the dolphin's leaping grace,

I am there.

When you reach out to touch another's heart,

as now I touch God's face,

I am there.

Do not weep for me. I am not gone.

[Sir Stewart]

Strength to you and yours J. Sorry.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nW_hfURy1Yk

[jcroach]

And a third:

 

People Liked Him

by Edgar A. Guest

 

People liked him, not because

He was rich or known to fame;

He had never won applause

As a star in any game

 

His was not a brilliant style,

His was not a forceful way,

But he had a gentle smile

And a kindly word to say

 

Never arrogant or proud,

On he went with manner mild;

Never quarrelsome or loud,

Just as simple as a child

 

Honest, patient, brave and true:

Thus he lived from day to day,

Doing what he found to do

In a cheerful sort of way

 

Wasn't one to boast of gold

Or belittle it with sneers,

Didn't change from hot to cold,

Kept his friends throughout the years

 

Sort of man you like to meet

Any time or any place

There was always something sweet

And refreshing in his face

 

Sort of man you'd like to be:

Balanced well and truly square;

Patient in adversity,

Generous when his skies were fair

 

Never lied to friend or foe,

Never rash in word or deed,

Quick to come and slow to go

In a neighbor's time of need

 

Never rose to wealth or fame,

Simply lived, and simply died,

But the passing of his name

Left a sorrow, far and wide

 

Not for glory he'd attained,

Nor for what he had of pelf,

Were the friends that he had gained,

But for what he was himself

[tkleist]

225 days under grass

and you know more than I.

they have long taken your blood,

you are a dry stick in a basket.

is this how it works?

in this room

the hours of love

still make shadows.

 

when you left

you took almost

everything.

I kneel in the nights

before tigers

that will not let me be.

 

what you were

will not happen again.

the tigers have found me

and I do not care.

 

- “For Jane” by Charles Bukowski

[Sir Stewart]

 

what you were

will not happen again.

 

 

That is .... yeah.

[uncool2pillow]

Vibes to you and your family

 

Husker Du - Hardly Getting Over It

 

Twenty years ago, saw a friend was walking by

And I stopped him on the street to ask him

How it went, and all he did was cry

I looked him in the face, but I couldn't see past his eyes

Asked him what the problem was, he says "Here is your disguise"

 

Now he's hardly getting over it

Hardly getting used to getting by

 

Old may lays down by the railroad tracks

Got no paper in his pocket, got no paper on his back

I asked him what the time was, he says "Hit the road now, Jack"

Went back to see him next week

He died of a heart attack and died away

 

Now he's hardly getting over it

Hardly getting used to getting by

 

Grandma, she got sick, she is going to die

And grandpa had a seizure, moved into a hotel cell and died away

My parents, they just wonder when they both are going to die

And what do I do when they die?

 

Now I'm hardly getting over it

Hardly getting used to getting by

[Sweet Papa Crimbo]

While this song isn't about passing on per se, it speaks to that certain longing:

 

Bruce Springsteen

Across the Border

 

Tonight my bag is packed

Tomorrow I'll walk these tracks

That will lead me across the border

 

Tomorrow my love and I

Will sleep 'neath auburn skies

Somewhere across the border

 

We'll leave behind my dear

The pain and sadness we found here

And we'll drink from the Bravo's muddy waters

 

Where the sky grows grey and white

We'll meet on the other side

There across the border

 

For you I'll build a house

High up on a grassy hill

Somewhere across the border

 

Where pain and memory

Pain and memory have been stilled

There across the border

 

And sweet blossoms fills the air

Pastures of gold and green

Roll down into cool clear waters

 

And in your arms 'neath the open skies

I'll kiss the sorrow from your eyes

There across the border

 

Tonight we'll sing the songs

I'll dream of you my corazon

And tomorrow my heart will be strong

 

And may the saints' blessing and grace

Carry me safely into your arms

There across the border

 

For what are we

Without hope in our hearts

That someday we'll drink from God's blessed waters

 

And eat the fruit from the vine

I know love and fortune will be mine

Somewhere across the border

[u2roolz]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C8lP7ZXe5t4

U2

MLK

 

Sleep

Sleep tonight

And may your dreams

Be realized

If the thundercloud

Passes rain

So let it rain

Rain down on him

Mmm...mmm...mmm...

So let it be

Mmm...mmm...mmm...

So let it be

Sleep

Sleep tonight

And may your dreams

Be realized

If the thundercloud

Passes rain

So let it rain

Let it rain

Rain on him

 

(sorry to be the movie geek in your time of grief, but Richard Kelly never got the rights to use this song at the end of the movie Donnie Darko and instead used Gary Jules' Mad World. But if you notice in the 1st 15 and last 15 seconds, the music is actually in the film in many different parts too. I don't think many people notice this at all, especially U2's lawyers.)

Edit: Ok. I don't feel so bad because I remember that you are a U2 fan. And this is an overlooked song to use in this type of setting. Everything about it is rather perfect, I think. It's so ethereal. )

[Moss]

Big vibes to you in this tough time.

 

That Bukowki is very nice, never heard that before.

 

I always like these lyrics:

 

Brokedown palace - Grateful Dead

 

Fare you well my honey

Fare you well my only true one

All the birds that were singing

Have flown except you alone

 

 

Goin to leave this Broke-down Palace

On my hands and my knees I will roll roll roll

Make myself a bed by the waterside

In my time - in my time - I will roll roll roll

 

 

In a bed, in a bed

by the waterside I will lay my head

Listen to the river sing sweet songs

to rock my soul

 

 

River gonna take me

Sing me sweet and sleepy

Sing me sweet and sleepy

all the way back back home

It's a far gone lullaby

sung many years ago

Mama, Mama, many worlds I've come

since I first left home

 

 

Goin home, goin home

by the waterside I will rest my bones

Listen to the river sing sweet songs

to rock my soul

 

 

Goin to plant a weeping willow

On the banks green edge it will grow grow grow

Sing a lullaby beside the water

Lovers come and go - the river roll roll roll

Fare you well, fare you well

I love you more than words can tell

Listen to the river sing sweet songs

to rock my soul

 

 

[bigshoulders]

Tom Waits' "Take Care of All of My Children"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1ehe3lsS3I

 

but this one is the one I want played at my funeral:

[choo-choo-charlie]

While this song isn't about passing on per se, it speaks to that certain longing:

 

Bruce Springsteen

Across the Border

 

Tonight my bag is packed

Tomorrow I'll walk these tracks

That will lead me across the border

 

Tomorrow my love and I

Will sleep 'neath auburn skies

Somewhere across the border

 

We'll leave behind my dear

The pain and sadness we found here

And we'll drink from the Bravo's muddy waters

 

Where the sky grows grey and white

We'll meet on the other side

There across the border

 

For you I'll build a house

High up on a grassy hill

Somewhere across the border

 

Where pain and memory

Pain and memory have been stilled

There across the border

 

And sweet blossoms fills the air

Pastures of gold and green

Roll down into cool clear waters

 

And in your arms 'neath the open skies

I'll kiss the sorrow from your eyes

There across the border

 

Tonight we'll sing the songs

I'll dream of you my corazon

And tomorrow my heart will be strong

 

And may the saints' blessing and grace

Carry me safely into your arms

There across the border

 

For what are we

Without hope in our hearts

That someday we'll drink from God's blessed waters

 

And eat the fruit from the vine

I know love and fortune will be mine

Somewhere across the border

 

In connection to the other thread I started about two months ago when my father passed - thank you for tipping me off to this song. It's been in heavy rotation and extremely comforting. I don't if I ever would have heard it otherwise...

[sgtpepper64]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AcUo9M9rfH0

 

Granted this is probably stupid to post on this board, but it was the first thing I thought of that really kind of fit (what I'm thinking) is what you're looking for. Great lyrics, and provide a hopeful look at things, I think. Surely one of their most touching songs, although in a reading, I'd probably cut out the "yeahs" ha.

 

I always thought it was particularly moving when says "We'll be together, yeah" in the second verse for some reason.

 

 

 

On and on and on we’ll stay together yeah

On and on and on we’ll be together yeah

You and I will try to stay together yeah

On and on and on we’ll be together yeah

 

Please don’t cry we’re designed to die

Don’t deny what’s inside

On and on and on we’ll stay together yeah

On and on and on

On and on and on

 

One day we’ll disappear together in a dream

However short or long our lives are going to be

I will live in you or you will live in me

Until we disappear together in a dream

 

Please don’t cry we’re designed to die

You can’t deny even the gentlest tide

On and on and on we’ll be together yeah

On and on and on

On and on and on

We’re going to try

 

Please don’t cry

This world of words and meanings makes you feel

outside

Something that you feel already

deep inside

You’ve denied

Go ahead and cry

 

On and on and on we’ll stay together yeah

On and on and on

On and on and on

 

You and I will stay together yeah

You and I will try to make it better yeah

 

 

Good feeling sent to you and yours.

[choo-choo-charlie]

Yeah, thanks. Got that one immediately.

[Lammycat]

I used to love her, but I had to kill her

I used to love her, but I had to kill her

I had to put her

Six feet under

And I can still hear her complain

 

 

I used to love her, but I had to kill her

I used to love her, but I had to kill her

I knew I miss her

So I had to keep her

She's buried right in my back yard

 

 

I used to love her, but I had to kill her

I used to love her, but I had to kill her

She bitched so much

She drove me nuts

And now I'm happier this way

 

 

I used to love her, but I had to kill her

I used to love her, but I had to kill her

I had to put her

Six feet under

And I can still hear her complain

[sgtpepper64]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUYdGe70hBs

 

I thought of this beautiful song by Joe Walsh as well. He wrote it about his young daughter who died.

It's a really unique sound for him, and a really great, sad song, with pure, emotional, simplistic lyrics.

 

 

Song For Emma - Joe Walsh

 

There's a feeling you get when you look to the sky

as if someone is watching, someone hears every word.

We are filled with regret, it was such a short time,

but we told him we loved you, hoping some how he heard.

(we hope he heard).

 

You were with us for a while then he took you

and he made your mama cry.

I can see it in her eyes there's a question as to why.

After all this time

still I find that I'm with an answer.

 

Goodbye.

(bye love)

[austrya]

How about "Do You Realize" by the Flaming Lips. I heard it this afternoon and as usual it made me cry.

 

 

Lyrics to Do You Realize? :

Do You Realize - that you have the most beautiful face

Do You Realize - we're floating in space -

Do You Realize - that happiness makes you cry

Do You Realize - that everyone you know someday will die

 

And instead of saying all of your goodbyes - let them know

You realize that life goes fast

It's hard to make the good things last

You realize the sun doesn't go down

It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

 

Do You Realize - Oh - Oh - Oh

Do You Realize - that everyone you know

Someday will die -

 

And instead of saying all of your goodbyes - let them know

You realize that life goes fast

It's hard to make the good things last

You realize the sun doesn't go down

It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

 

Do You Realize - that you have the most beautiful face

Do You Realize