cryptique

Brie, baguettes, and Bordeaux. Whoops, wrong country.

Something tells me there's more to this story.

"NODDING AT COPPERS"

Because it was off all the time? Oh. Wait. Never mind.

HEAD ON - APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD! HEAD ON - APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD! HEAD ON - APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD!

"knowing which screwdriver is which"

"nodding at coppers"

"Phone calls that last less than a minute"

...and wouldn't it just be easier to say "4

"men"

Huh. I wondered what that shit was. So ... they're trying to give me a headache with their commercial, so that I'll want to use their product? Most annoying commercial ever. Melissa and I lunge for the remote whenever it comes on. That, and the Taylor Hicks Ford ad. Also, around here, we have this one: NEED A PLUMBER? CALL 1-800-PLUMBER! NEED A PLUMBER? CALL 1-800-PLUMBER! NEED A PLUMBER? CALL 1-800-PLUMBER!

SOOOOOO GAY!!!

For the love of god, won't someone please spell "gel" correctly?

I could never get a MILF as hot as his mom.

I hate all hair gook. Natural all the way.

Double amputee? I guess if you're into that sort of thing...

Jonathan Papelbon: Collected # 1 Singles Really: new Richard Buckner

IT'S BOXING DAY IN JULY!!!!@@!!!1!!

Are those mossy patches mostly on the north side of his hog?

WWJPD?

Is this why he wanted to go up into space and hang out in confined spaces with other men?

I KNOW!!!!!@@!!!!11!!

He hated Mexicans! And he was half Mexican! ...And he hated irony! Did I ever tell you about the time Papelbon took me out to go get a drink with him? We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one. Finally Papelbon takes me to a vacant lot and says, 'Here we are.' We sat there for a year and a half and sure enough someone constructs a bar around us. The day they opened we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Papelbon yelled over the roar of the flames, 'Always leave things the way you found em!