To Spank Or Not To Spank

[Atticus]

Wifey and I don't have any kids yet, but are planning to create in our own images at some point in the future.

 

I was listening to a radio show yesterday, the topic of which was corporal punishment, and I was just wondering what you VC parents out there thought about the whole thing. Do you spank?

 

as a tangent, is there a country with less-disciplined children than the United States?

[MattZ]

My wife once told me that her parents made her pick out the belt they would use. We dont have kids. We wont be doing that.

[embiggen]

spank but don't beat. sometimes a nice pop on the rear works. it worked for me when I was a smart ass kid.

 

 

now you can all tell me what a horrible person I am.

[jimmyjimmy]

I think if you as a parent approach it as a disciplinary tool and not a means as to extract retribution (there are wackos out there...) I think it's effective. And as long as you don't really hurt the child per-say it's cool.

If the child is conditioned to feel that this is an awful fate he's suffering by receiving a light spanking on the bottom the physiological threat becomes more daunting than the actual act itself.

 

Worked on me anyway.

[Dude]

Spanking is cruel and inhumane. I plan on investing in a Taser to keep my kids in line.

[deepseacatfish]

I was never spanked and I think I turned out alright...

[Edie]

The one and only time I spanked Jake was when he was 3 and broke away from me and ran into the street. I hit him on the butt to let him know I was really really mad. I don't believe in it however; spanking and threats do not make effective parenting.

 

As far as spanking my husband....

[Atticus]

[WITHIK]

Not the Ction masterbation thread I expected.

[Duck-Billed Catechist]

I make threats like it's going out of style (not spanking-related).

[SlowBurn68]

Beat the crap out of them and remember that your children are not special.

[embiggen]

[Sir Stewart]

Beat the crap out of them and remember that your children are not special.

Seconded.

[plasticeyeball]

i can make any one of my kids cry just by looking at them so i haven't found the need.

 

 

now as far as watching edie spank her husband

[WilcoFan]

I was never spanked and I think I turned out alright...

 

 

I was spanked and turned out alright. I have 3 kids. One kid completely responds to it, another responds to the mere threat of a spanking and the other well... we still haven't figured him out.

 

Even if you do spank your kids it should be done sparingly. Spare the rod, spoil the child.

 

Also, for those of you who don't have kids and say you won't spank them, we'll see when you do have kids and they are testing you all day long, every day.

[embiggen]

i can make any one of my kids cry just by looking at them so i haven't found the need.

 

do you ever chase them around the house with your plastic eyeball?

[Elixir Sue]

I was spanked and turned out alright.

Same here. My mom's weapon of choice was that wooden paddle that came with an elastic band and ball attached to it (without the band and ball). It sucks being spanked with your own toy.

 

But like I said, I turned out alright.

[Atticus]

I was spanked as a promised/threatened course of last resort, so I knew it was coming. I think it was effective to the extent that the thought of my parents being so fed up with me that they'd result to restrained violence made me get in line. (Unless it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a smart ass, in which case sometimes I'd just accept the spanking as a cost of doing business).

[Pocahontas]

A pat on the behind to get their attention is ok. I always used timeout chairs for my kids and when they got older they were sent to their rooms. My mother always had us go out and pick a switch off a tree that was worse than the belt. My mother also used to throw shoes at my sister and she also gave her a few fat lips as a teen, there is a right way to discipline and there is a wrong way, my mother was wrong with the way she handled it. My family tells me I have the best behaved kids in the family and I never had to really spank them just used the discipline I have mentioned. Screaming at your children is not a good idea either sometimes verbal abuse is worse than physical, the scars on your body heal, but the scars on your brain stay. I hope this helped you to decide what is the best way to discipline.

[plasticeyeball]

do you ever chase them around the house with your plastic eyeball?

 

 

of course. that's the trick to making them cry, i make them look in the hole.

 

 

 

 

 

 

(not really, but all three kids have seen me take it out and clean it whereas no one else has, not even my wife.)

[JUDE]

I'm spanking my "child" right now.

[EL the Famous]

[quote name='JUDE

[austrya]

I rarely spank. Sometimes though, that's the only way I can get through to my 4 year old that I mean business. I don't think I've actually ever hurt him when I spanked him.

 

I wouldn't spank my oldest one anymore. He's 8 now and I think he's a little too old for that.

 

I've probably only spanked my kids a few times in their lives. They're pretty good kids for the most part.

 

I'm starting to wonder a little about the 4 year old though. Last week he got in his grandpa's truck, started it, rolled up the windows, locked the doors, got out, and shut the doors. How the heck does a 4 year old know how to do all of that?

[EL the Famous]

How the heck does a 4 year old know how to do all of that?

 

My guess is either Grandpa or the 8-year-old.

[ponch1028]

I was probably spanked daily, and I deserved every one of them. As I got older, wooden spoons were the rod of choice. Eventually, my buttocks firmed up and the spoons would break upon contact. Once, though, I got caught with a hardback book stuffed in the back of my jeans (like my mother wasn't going to notice that), and that was the only time I was spanked with a 1x2 piece of lumber.

 

Now, was that child abuse? Back then, I don't think so. Would that be acceptable now? I think the general consensus would be no. But back in the late 70's and early 80's most of my friends and I were subjected to this type of discipline. It was pretty common. Nowadays, it's not that common, though spanking is still an evenly divided issue as far as I can tell.

 

Personally, I don't have a problem with parents choosing to spank, though I do believe it should be the last resort and form of discipline. Also, my parents never physically disciplined me in public or in front of others. I think that is a sound and wise principle. Public, physical discipline adds the element of shame and humiliation, plus nowadays you could also get into trouble.

 

My wife and I have not spanked our 3 1/2 year old daughter. We can't say we won't, but we've tried to be constructive and creative in our discipline. I know it would be just as devastating (if not more) to us if we had to resort of spanking as it would be for our daughter, but young children are suppose to listen and obey their parents (it's for their own good) and if all else fails ...

 

I do think the most effective element of spanking (or swatting or swinging would be a more accurate term for my childhood discipline) in my experience was the consistency and predictability. Everytime I got spanked, it was because I did or said something that I knew would result in a spanking if I got caught. Consistency is imperative to all forms of discipline. I think this is where parents fail in rearing well-behaved children more than the issue of spanking or not (my wife and I are just as guilty as the next person).

 

Finally, there has to be a united front. If one parent promotes spanking but the other has objections, that's a bad recipe for the child and the parents. Any type of discipline has to be backed up and supported by both parents for it to be effective in the long haul. Kids are too smart, swarmy, and crafty to not notice a divided front.

 

BTW, my wife thinks my butt is HOT. Gotta think the wooden spoon during my formative years had something to do with that.