Do you have trouble maintaining an election?

[OOO]

[c53x12]

Call your doctor if you experience an election lasting more than four hours.

[Skian]

With all the talk of a stimulus package, an election just might happen.

[embiggen]

side effects may include, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, skin rash and boils lasting up to 3 weeks.

 

 

 

btw, I have already voted!

[lamradio]

With all the talk of a stimulus package, an election just might happen.

 

Yeah, a lot of people are saying that President Bush's package is just the right size to be affective.

[cryptique]

Hillary's a caucus tease.

[ikol]

If you have trouble getting your "vote" in, it might be due to electile dysfunction.

[lamradio]

Bush Hopes To Stimulate Economy With His Massive Package

[Sir Stewart]

Saw Obama last night. Contrary to hype, it was nothing like a "rock concert." It was a political rally.

[jakobnicholas]

To maintain your election, think of baseball or cars or Hillary Clinton's legs.

[ZenLunatic]

erection - a japanese vote

[Analogman]

DNC boost for sex biz

Denver can expect prostitution spike during convention

 

By Daniel J. Chacon

 

Originally published 12:30 a.m., February 4, 2008

Updated 03:33 p.m., February 4, 2008

 

Political tricks may not be the only ones turned during the Democratic National Convention in Denver this August.

 

The sex and adult entertainment industries are expecting a boom in business when an estimated 35,000 visitors descend on the Mile High City for the presidential nominating bash.

 

At the Pepsi Center, the focus will be on a single nominee.

 

But outside the event, the choices available to the delegates, journalists and others are unlimited, giving new meaning to the term "conventional sex."

 

More than six months before the convention comes to Denver, the offerings already online range from Claudia the "she- male porn star" to Erin the "adorable college cutie," whose $300- an-hour services are guaranteed to "leave you breathless."

 

Surprised?

 

Don't be.

 

Denver is, after all, home to Mike Jones, the beefy male prostitute who claimed to have bedded the Rev. Ted Haggard in his Capitol Hill apartment.

 

Jay Watson, who promises an unforgettable milk bath and lotion massage for $125 an hour, said he's expecting to be busy during the DNC Aug. 25-28.

 

Why?

 

"Because look at me," said Watson, a 25-year-old Aurora man with a Mohawk. "I'm cute. I'm sexy and I deliver it all."

 

'More business' from GOP

 

Too bad for Watson and others like him that Denver didn't land the GOP convention instead, said Carol Leigh, a San Francisco prostitute "over 50" who has traveled to previous Democratic conventions in Los Angeles and Atlanta.

 

"It would be a lot better for the sex workers if it was the Republican convention," she said.

 

"We get a lot more business. I don't know if they're just frustrated because of the family values agenda," she said.

 

When the Republican convention was held in New York in 2004, some sex workers offered limited-time discounts, according to New York Magazine, which ran a feature story titled "The Girls in Their Summer Hot Pants."

 

Officer Ana Aguirre, a spokeswoman for the Los Angeles police, which hosted the DNC in 2000, said there's "definitely a spike" in prostitution during large events like political conventions.

 

In Denver, said police spokesman Sonny Jackson, "We're preparing to handle a variety of issues that may come up."

 

Even though they attract a lot of people, political conventions aren't the most profitable for the men and women in the world's oldest profession, Leigh said.

 

"Computer conventions can be lucrative," she said. "There's a lot of nerds that don't get out much."

 

But money is money, and the Democrats are expected to inject millions of dollars into the metro area when they flock into town.

 

"We're preparing to be busy for that convention," said Tracy, a manager for Bare Assets, a Denver-based adult entertainment agency that does everything "from singing telegrams to novelty acts to topless to nude."

 

Tracy declined to give her last name or say whether the agency had any DNC-related bookings.

 

"Whether it be because of the convention or because it's somebody's bachelor party, it's just private (information)," she said.

 

Jumps in advertising

 

Beverly Chastain, a door girl at the Diamond Cabaret & Steakhouse, a gentleman's club downtown, said reservations should start picking up this month.

 

"When it comes to conventions and stuff, we do free entry for it and then we just plan on advertising our lunch buffet and stuff more," she said.

 

Taylor Wheeler, classified sales manager for Westword, a weekly that includes an escort and body rub section, said his staff is expecting an increase in personals as the DNC approaches.

 

"I can't say it didn't cross our mind with all the delegates in town that they might be kind of on their own," he said.

 

Advertising for escorts and other personals jumped when the NBA All-Star game was in town, he said.

[gogo]

Seriously? This is the best we can do on Super Tuesday? A bunch of lame sex puns?

 

Anyway: I voted this morning. Our polling place is just a few doors down from my house, in Newcomer High School, which is specifically for immigrant kids to get proficient in English before moving on to a mainstream high school. When I went in, a teacher was in the polling area, explaining the process to a group of students. It was a very cool way to start the morning.

[bobbob1313]

So 2000 was a primo example of electile dysfunction, right?

[Guest Jules]

Where can I find information on all the non-president races up for vote today (Illinois - DuPage). I know most of them, but there are always a few I am clueless on, which I hate.

[JUDE]

I've gotten like 3 text massages from candidates today. WTF!?!?

[Sir Stewart]

[quote name='JUDE

[Duck-Billed Catechist]

Where can I find information on all the non-president races up for vote today (Illinois - DuPage). I know most of them, but there are always a few I am clueless on, which I hate.

I sometimes try to find the state bar ratings for the judges. Other than that, the Daily Herald and the candidates' websites?

Here is the candidate listing:

http://cms.dupageelections.com/uploads/JID...e%20listing.pdf

The Republicans begin on page 8.

I forgot that we get to vote for specific delegates--that's weird. I am going to vote for the dude who's going to lose the Dem nomination for the 6th District.

[JUDE]

Hawt.

All dudes, man, they were all dudes

[mountain bed]

I'm bummed that I don't get to vote until May. It could all be set in stone by then. Or not.

[Guest Jules]

I sometimes try to find the state bar ratings for the judges. Other than that, the Daily Herald and the candidates' websites?

Here is the candidate listing:

http://cms.dupageelections.com/uploads/JID...e%20listing.pdf

The Republicans begin on page 8.

I forgot that we get to vote for specific delegates--that's weird. I am going to vote for the dude who's going to lose the Dem nomination for the 6th District.

Thanks, this is exactly what I needed. Don't know why I couldn't find it myself, but thanks.

[Duck-Billed Catechist]

Thanks, this is exactly what I needed. Don't know why I couldn't find it myself, but thanks.

If you check your voter registration on that site, you can even see a sample ballot.

[Dr. Steve Brule]

I didn't understand the voting for delegates at all. As an undecided though it was nice to give one delgate to my other choice, even though I don't understand why.

[bjorn_skurj]

I voted.

[Mrs. Peel]

I couldn't vote because I'm a registered independent and CT has a closed primary, which means I can't vote for either side.

 

In other terrifying news, Huckabee has won all delagates in West Virginia.

Come on, A-man, what's the matter with you people down there???